hi,

you have no idea how much thankful I am having you in my life. though sometimes we have our petty fights or me being such a brat, but, gosh, I feel like I don’t deserve all the love that you are giving to me. you are always the one to understand, or should I say, you are the one to put a lot of patience in this relationship and for that, I am beyond thankful for your mere existence.

I thank God that I met you. maybe we are total opposite but opposites do attract, right? we learn to appreciate each other’s flaws and differences, and it may be tough sometimes but that’s  what makes our relationship much stronger.

I love you and everything about you. don’t  you ever forget that!

words really aren’t enough. I may not have a romantic bone in my system but I will keep saying this: I love you and that you should know this by now. even if I get mad at you over nothing, or if we have petty fights over little things, please know that I won’t get tired of you. I feel like I should be the one to say: I hope you won’t get tired of me. I only want to make plans with you and ONLY YOU.

Happy birthday, habibi.

I love you.

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about yesterday

I felt my Sunday was incomplete because I was not able to write my Sunday Currently entry and that’s because I was out ’til late with the boyfriend. I was thinking to write my entry even if it’s the witching hour but I failed, I was too tired and sleepy. Ergo, this entry is about what happened the whole day yesterday. Sounds good? [yeah, I am trying to, at least, make my Sunday currently in low-key. Lol]

So her mother asked me to go to their house in the morning because she told me that they will go to the mall and was inviting me to join for lunch. Fortunately, the boyfriend got lazy to go to work, so we went together.

Before lunch, we went to the mall. We walked around and let the kids play for an hour. My boyfriend went to buy for new shorts and tshirts. And this is the frustrating part: So he said that he will buy me a notebook & pen or a book, whatever I wanted. BUT!!!!! When I was about to look for the book that I was looking for, the bookstore was cleaning the shelves, and most of the books were gone and the shelves were not properly arranged. So I decided to just look for a cute notebook for my attempt to bullet journalling. BUT AGAIN!!!!!! The notebooks were all cream ruled paper, I was about to get one with dotted paper but it happened they have nothing with that kind. So we end up walking to the department store, hoping they have the notebook that I was looking for. But yesterday was not for me. I end up buying nothing!!!!! :——-[

Okay, let me tell you something about my boyfriend.

He doesn’t like loooong walks. So when we are in the mall, and I am in the middle of checking out the stores that I want or even browsing books in the bookstore, he always wants to go home early or make this silly excuse of having a bad stomachache etc etc. He pisses me off BIG time whenever he reasons that out!!! I’ll know if he doesn’t want to walk anymore when I hear him tsk tsk tsk ang his face becomes looooong while we are walking and that irritates me more.

We are totally opposite, but they say opposites attract. Well, I won’t say something about that. Hahahaha!

We had our dinner at their house, and went home past 8 o’clock. I know I still had time to write my Sunday Currently but I was so dead-tired from the walking anf feeling irritated that I just want to tuck myself to bed and just sleep.

That’s it. That’s how my Sunday went. I am still sad about not getting a good notebook & pen. But that’s okay, he told me that we can look for it this week. ❤ ❤

To love or to be loved(?)

I had been in a few relationships (two to be exact which didn’t last for long, two months top) but right now, I am in a 1 year and 7 months relationship with my boyfriend (I must say he’s good at keeping me lol) so I am getting questions on how I made it to a year-long with him (though I know it is not that very long and we have a long loooong way to go to know each other pretty well) so the question: is it better to love or to be loved?

My grandma always tell me that I should find a guy who will give his whole heart to me, who will love me despite of all my imperfections and bad qualities. I remember everytime my suitor will visit me at home (okay my family’s too old school but I am glad I was raise that way), my grandma will always stay in the living room with us, unaware and awkward, she will talk about senseless things about me being lazy and all I want to do in life is to sleep and eat and if ever I will find the guy for me, she will pity him because of knowing me like I am sort of a heavy baggage.

Giving love to someone, for me, is easy. Not exactly love, but admiration or honoring him/her. You can learn to love someone with his/her personality, be it romantic or brotherly or love for friends or love for your family, you can learn to love them. There’s a lot of reasons to love. But on the other hand, you can’t control over other feelings. You can’t make a person fall in love with you in an instant. You can’t choose someone to ask them to love you nor make them want you. It is just like pleasing other people. You can’t please everyone, right?

Is love pertains to the efforts given to the other person? Or the assurance to have that one person to spend our whole life with? Or love as a responsibility?

I love my boyfriend but I feel that my boyfriend loves me more, and I am grateful to have him. I honestly don’t have a crush on him when we first met but with his efforts to show how he loves and respects me and how I am important to him pulled a heartstring on me.

To be loved by someone who you love feels so much better than just receiving love from a person and same goes to being in love with a person who doesn’t love you back. But it really doesn’t matter, does it? It is not about who you love or who loves more or giving back the love that we received or not asking for it but this simple question only makes me realise that we are all capable to love whether it is only one-sided or on equal measures and it really makes sense. ❤

What do you think? I would love to read your thoughts!