I tried so hard to push away all the thoughts that keep on making me depressed and all but I just can’t. It feels like I am just fooling with myself. And when I tried to talk to people, I got tongue-tied. It’s automatic, like a defense mechanism, that if I say one wrong word it will just worsen the situation.
I am trying to get hold of what matters to me right now and still convincing myself that soon everything will be back to its own pace just like in the past and perhaps my old self will be back too.
I know that I always say things like “I will be okay in no time.” and “Everything will be okay.” but nothing’s happening. I know that it is my fault too that I am like this and It came to my senses that nothing will happen if I will just remain sad and depressed and listless. I need to get my act straight and focus to what I want to achieve: Happiness.
Happiness in all things; this is only what I want.